One Step at a Time!
I'm on the porch swing. My tippy-toes are swaying, and my heart is in its landing place. Grief + Loss just does not follow any sort of rules.
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I'm feeling it, his thumbprint on my heart. The grooves are etched inside there, and when the grief waves come rolling through, if you were to place your hand upon my heart, I'd wince ever so slightly.
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And, just like gravity pulling me, I find myself where my healing began, on The Porch Swing. If you were to join me, you'd see that in the center carved into the wood are the words, "Beloved Champion." And, when my heart needs a place to land, I am certain that all the salty tears are kept safe inside the grain of the wood. I run my fingers over the woodgrain, and I close my eyes. I'm taken back to when the Beloved Champion and I would sip on morning coffee, talking about heaven and how he would let her, and I know he is close. We talked about the thin veil between here and there and how we aren't sure how it works but that we are confident that this here is just the beginning. Kind of like a prologue to a never-ending story. And, somehow, we will always be connected on an ethereal, eternal, soul level.
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This is just me speaking of my experience. Friends, there couldn't happen to be anything more tangibly true. Suppose there is something I wish my limited human vocabulary could share. In that case, it'd be this, our relationship with our loved ones who are no longer here on this side of heaven; your relationship doesn't end. If anything, it continues to grow, and the love inside your heart grows too.
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It's like a modern-day miracle. It's a one-step-at-a-time journey. It's a love language that speaks into the depths of physical time and space where the whispers of your words tug on that golden thread connecting your souls forever. And, in the depths of that salty grief wave, he meets you there, like a whisper in the wind catching you, swaying you, back-and-forth on, The Porch Swing.
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For the hearts that are navigating Grief + Loss, friend, I am sorry for the shatter of your heart. Know that there is nothing wrong with you. Your feelings are genuine, valid, and a byproduct of love.
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How beautiful and brave of you. I hope you feel permission to ride the salty wave. Keep swimming, friend. There is no rush, time frame, or pressure for you to show up in any other way than "you." I hope your expression of love for your beloved is held gently by your community, and your heart is received as you ebb and flow and grow.
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There is room for you here on, The Porch Swing, where healing happens.